EP Back-Track: "Archangel"

I mentioned in "Back-track: Child of the Nile" the wisdom of my childhood friend Moses that it is important to always keep positive, don't look down, and "hope for home".

It has often been a wonder that home isn't this material, physical place on earth that can be defined by length lived, or memories taken, or birthplace. To me it has come more to define belonging, peace and comfort. When I think of these three feelings I go to my family. The family bond can be strong - some might say it is the tribal tie that our survivalism originates from, and should under no circumstances ever be broken - and for me my family were always that: my tribe.

We shared so much together, we moved country together, went on holiday together. When we had to adapt to a new place, get our bearings on a new life and form new friendships, we always had each other. Even our family dog, Kovu, introduced during our first year in Holland, gave life to the tribe.

But for me, there was a slight disparity between my older siblings, Lucy being seven years my elder and Josh five. Through my childhood I don't remember them much, though they were there, and it wasn't until I became a teenager and understood the value of family did I truly recognise them.

I consider this song a tribute to my sister, but in all honesty I wrote it the day my brother left us for university in England.

I couldn't address why at the time - sure life was chaotic enough at fifteen - but I have often felt the loss of my brother gave me a sudden realisation of what my siblings meant to me, and how to give closure to their sudden leave-taking.

"I know you love me, because I paid the price". This rings true for any goodbye, and sure the pain of goodbyes becomes a regular feature in the life of a TCK. Time immemorial has seen family's break apart, tribes disbanded, as one of them goes off to a new life, on another adventure - might as well sometimes be to another country. It's a normal passage, stronger the further away it is, the closer the tie, but no less a price that has to be paid for relationship.

As life went along, I actually grew closer to my siblings as I neared adulthood. The problematic times can be advantageous when you're the youngest of three, and you know two siblings who have tried and failed before you. Josh always had more of a strong hand, whereas Lucy graced me with her gentle touch. Mum and Dad were archangels to me too, for a lot of other things, but they were always there, until I flew the nest, with the wings they passed on to me.

But life didn't come easy, even with these guiding souls of support. When the world

turns too much the paler shade of blue, one can only rely on their self, can't they?

I remember when I started travelling independently - guitar, clothes and an open road - I thought I was alone in my adventure. The first day people had sussed me out as a wanderer, and all along helped me on my way. I'll never forget them, the care they shared, the laughter, the joy, the generosity of time and the benefit of the doubt. My life, and I hope and trust, all our collective lives in union have graced many 'archangels'. It's the spiritual notion that those who guide us are always with us, the wisdom-givers and light-bringers - the man at the cornershop, the hairdresser, whoever it might be.

For me it began with my close kin, but since it has been a Brazilian bluesist, a Belizean pirate, and all those featured on my upcoming "To We the World" album, spirit guides who have found me off-course and brought me on the wind.

We always have to say goodbye, but we can have time to give each other what we need, and the closure mends the void.

I am forever thankful to my "archangels", most of all my dear Lucy, who always brings her silver lines.